Breaking the news to your kids about divorce is one of the first, of many steps in the divorce process. However, it might be one of the most difficult. It is not easy to tell your children that you and their other parent are no longer in love and do not want to be together.
Fortunately, there are a few helpful pieces of advice you can use to make this process easier for both you and your children. Here are three things to keep in mind to make talking about divorce less difficult for you and your kids.
Prepare beforehand
Preparing for the upcoming conversation can help make the process simpler. This is a difficult talk to have with your children. Knowing what you want to say ahead of time can help reduce your stress.
You may want to outline major talking points that you will want to cover during this conversation. This can include that you will always love your children and that the divorce is not their fault, among other key ideas. You may also want give them an outline about what is going to happen during the divorce.
Get the timing right
Timing is everything, including when you are telling your kids about divorce. There are a few different timing components you may want to consider when preparing to break the news to your children.
You should tell your children at the same time. Chances are, you want them to hear the news from you and your soon-to-be-ex, not one of their siblings. Similarly, you may want to tell the rest of your family around the same time as your children, so they do not hear about it from a well-meaning aunt or cousin.
Let your kids take the lead
Your children may have many questions after hearing the news. You should let them tell you what is on their mind and ask you any questions they may have. Letting your kids take the lead in the conversation can provide them with some security.
Answer their questions truthfully and as thoroughly as you can. This can help reduce their stress. If your kids feel like they know what is going on, this can make the process easier for them.
There is no good way to tell your kids about a divorce. They may feel sad, angry and distressed after hearing the news, and these are not easy emotions to feel or see. However, these are a few ways you can make this initial conversation and the overall divorce experience easier for them.